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Bass Player Fine List:



NAME OF OFFENDER (Bass Player)_______________________

INFRACTION DATE___________________________

MUSICAL OFFENSES

[ ] Playing loudly during warm up $10

[ ] Sound-checking amp with funk slapping $25

[ ] Loud cursing after mistake $10

[ ] Playing high and fast after mistake $20

[ ] Practicing 2-handed tapping between tunes $20

[ ] Asking for "E" tuning note $25

[ ] Playing E anyway when horns tune to Bb $50

[ ] Playing written-out walking line $50

[ ] Failure to play written walking line $75

[ ] Writing note names over ledger-line notes $50

[ ] Writing beat numbers under dotted figures $50

[ ] Playing eighth notes $5 each

[ ] Playing sixteenth notes $10 each

[ ] Playing above 1st octave - immediate dismissal

[ ] Dragging fast tempo $75

[ ] Dragging ballad tempo $100

[ ] Blacking out during ballad $200

[ ] Ignoring drummer's tempo $100

[ ] Following drummer's tempo $250

[ ] Asking to borrow Real Book for All Of Me $1000


UPRIGHT PLAYERS

[ ] Showing up before first downbeat $25

[ ] Playing audibly $25

[ ] Faking changes $25

[ ] Slapping $150

[ ] Missing tutti lick, then mentioning vintage of bass $25

[ ] Excessive sweating $25

[ ] Pedal point double-stops during horn solo $50

[ ] Asking leader for a solo $30

[ ] Accepting solo when offerred $50

[ ] Taking second chorus $100

[ ] Playing solo arco $400

[ ] Pretending to check tuning after playing out of tune $100

[ ] Playing "A Train" ending on every tune $200

[ ] Playing extended "A Train" ending on every tune $500


ELECTRIC PLAYERS

[ ] Checking hair between tunes $15

[ ] Experimenting with odd meters $25

[ ] Missing root at end of blistering fill $25

[ ] Playing with a pick $50

[ ] Tuning during ballad $30

[ ] Playing Jaco groove on samba $75

[ ] Playing Jaco samba groove on ballad $150

[ ] Attempting last word on final chord $50

[ ] Achieving last word on final chord $100

[ ] Long gliss down to final note $200


EQUIPMENT VIOLATIONS - ELECTRIC

[ ] Forgetting strap $10

[ ] Changing strings after every set $15

[ ] Using electric tuner $15

[ ] Setting up mic "just in case" $75

[ ] Forgetting to turn amp on $40

[ ] Bringing amp larger than 1 person can carry in 1 trip $50

[ ] Asking horn player for help moving amp $25

[ ] Bringing custom-made bass $100 per string above 4

[ ] Bringing more than 1 bass $100 per extra bass

[ ] Skull decals on bass $150

[ ] Bringing fretless bass $500


CRIMINAL BAD TASTE

[ ] Telling bone player about all the gigs you get $10

[ ] Asking bone player about their day gig $10

[ ] Sitting behind drums on break $10

[ ] Quoting "Birdland" $25

[ ] Practicing scales during break $25

[ ] Practicing scales during drum solo $50

[ ] Practicing $150

[ ] Beginning a sentence with "When I was a guitar player..." $50

[ ] Casually mentioning to Musical Director of cheap theater that you are "into sequencing" $100


BASIC STUPIDITY

[ ] Wearing old Buddy Rich tour shirt $10

[ ] Wearing new Whitesnake tour shirt $20

[ ] Asking when the rock set starts $20

[ ] Continually asking "where are we?" $25

[ ] Continually shouting "Yeah!" $25

[ ] Asking bone player where "1" is $50

[ ] Taking cell phone call during 4's $100

Hi, I'm Dave!
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